This Little Light Of Mine

I just remembered how I would constantly be singing this song when I was little... & how I wish I could go back and warn myself of everything that was to come and take my light away... I was once very innocent and naive about people and what they could do to me. I've been put down and pushed around and taken advantage of. I developed depression and anxiety. I became an angry and sad person. I was too afraid to stand up for myself, and was pressured into many things that I really didn't want to do: lying, cheating, smoking, drugs, alcohol, sex... I didn't know who I had become. I would look in the mirror and not know who I was. The horror of feeling so lost in your own skin, always leading to self-destruction, in more ways than one. The constant battle of debates in your head, fighting against your thoughts and what is reality. Trying to find something to give you hope, to keep you wanting to be alive, but only resorting back to the very things that made you feel so helpless in the first place. The cycle is hell. I honestly cannot tell you how I escaped the cycle, however. It seemed like such an impossible thing to do, living in that darkness and desperation. But the truth is.. my light was never taken away. It always remained inside of me. And each second, each minute, each day, each week I was able to stay away from the pressure people put on me, the stronger I became. The darkness lessened and my light shown closer to the surface. I used my light to block out the negative influences, while slowly discovering who the inner-me really was. It was a great struggle and took a long time, but eventually, it was clear who I was supposed to be. I am now able to stand up for myself and do the things I want to do, and refuse the things I don't. I realized that this is MY life and I only have one, so I am going to live it MY way. You can never give up, and you can never give in. You have your own light inside of you. You must keep searching and stay strong, and you too will find yourself. Embrace your light, and let it shine.

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

"Good things come to those who wait."

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"Sometimes what you're looking for comes when you're not looking at all."

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Recently, this has been so true. Every now and then things seem to run on a downward path. Some things don't go right or the way I'd like them to, and I get disappointed. Sometimes I just lose my sense of purpose. But as I start to relax and lose concern about the tiny details, good things start to happen! I might receive a random compliment from someone at school, come across an uplifting article online, or re-discover one of my favorite songs. But most recently, an old friend from highschool contacted me, who I thought I would never talk to or see again. I hadn't talked to him since graduation, almost 6 months ago. It was very surprising. It just made me feel good that I was actually remembered, by someone who I hadn't talked to very much in the first place. Things like this help restore some hope in my life.

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This all makes me realize how important it is to have patience. We all need to learn how to "let go" more, and release some of the control we have on our lives. Sometimes, if you want something, and you try really hard to get it, nothing comes around. Sometimes, waiting is the only thing you can do. Waiting kind of does what sleep does to the brain. It gives time to sort things out. Let's face it, not all of our problems can be solved in one day, can they? You have to have patience. "Sometimes what you're looking for comes when you're not looking at all." This has happened to me. Great people have come into my life, when I least expected it. I wasn't searching for them, but they were waiting there, right under my nose. They appeared at a perfect time, and I am so thankful for them. :)

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Just something to add.. a cover of Jack Johnson's "Sitting, Waiting, Wishing" by The Gaslight Anthem's (one of my favorite bands!) lead singer, Brian Fallon. Enjoy. :)

 

 

The Moment of Peace

I have discovered an event that is to take place on March 10, 2012. It is called The Moment of Peace. On this coming Saturday, at 8pm, people all around the world will be in silence for one hour. It will be one hour of Peace. People will put aside their differences and arguments, turn off the television and radio, put away their worries and struggles, and enjoy this moment of peace. There is no specific place or way that this is to be done. Either as an individual or a group, live in silence for one hour. Sit, pray, meditate, or just enjoy this moment of silence and peace with others, and the people of the world. This event is the beginning of a time of transformation and healing, within ourselves, and with the other people that surround us. In doing this, it is showing how we are all united in life and we all have the same goal for peace and happiness. The unified message that this moment sends to the world is the following:

1. That change on a larger scale starts through change in ourselves.
2. There are more constructive and effective ways than war and violence to bring peace.
3. That people from all religious, spiritual, geographic, and cultural backgrounds can actually unite harmoniously under a single, common embracing premise for the betterment of humanity.
4. It is necessary that we teach and experientially show our children how to better manage the human experience – emotions, thoughts, and psyche – to live well, be happy, and create peace.
5. That we can bring peace within ourselves and in our communities by taking time to be silent regularly.
6. That Silence, Meditation, and Prayer are necessary daily life skills for our happiness and peace.

Together, we can prove a point, we can solve problems, we can create Peace, we can make a difference.

For more information on The Moment of Peace, please visit: http://www.themomentofpeace.com/